Happy New Year! One year closes and another begins, it’s traditionally the time we set our goals, our intention, what we plan to accomplish. I’m finding that especially difficult at the moment, because I have a ton of options, and the unrelenting belief that I could happily live out any one of them.

This “good problem to have” is still a problem. I want to begin, to get in motion, to be on the path to my goals, but I know my life can go in any direction I imagine. When you feel that way, sometimes it can be hard to get started. I believe it’s called the paradox of choice (or I might have made that up but anyway, cool term.) When we have no options, we often don’t consider other options, and we go about our merry way. The alternative of considering other paths and comparing our lives to others can bring on depression because we’re judging, being ungrateful for our actual situation, and creating separation from ourselves and happiness. The mental solution is acceptance of what is.

However, when you DO have a great many options, and the full well knowledge they are possible, there is an inherent struggle that takes place. Life is beautiful and I can make it anything I can dream of, but I don’t have forever to live. I don’t know if I get to do it over again. There’s no rewind button. So I can do anything, but I can think of a great many things! All this opportunity can become paralyzing. I suppose the trick is to focus on whatever you are doing and don’t worry about what you aren’t, but don’t we all have ADD these days? The real paradox is that we don’t want to miss out on anything, but by being distracted by what we aren’t doing or could be doing, we end up missing out on the greater depths of what is right in front of us.

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Ooook, so day 38, nearing the end of November, seems like a good time to take stock of where I’m at and make sure I set goals for the rest of the month that put me in a position to be successful.


Days Left (counting today since it’s 7am): 36
VPPs needed: 248,816
VPP/day: 6911.56
Rake/day: $1256.65

^This is technically the math, but it seems real unwise to shoot for the bare minimum. I need to be ahead, b/c I never know what can happen. The volume may not be there some days, my brain sometimes just absolutely needs to rest, sometimes I make a mistake in diet and I can’t focus for as long. Things happen. Something could happen in my personal life or with my health, and any of these things could make playing on any one specific day suddenly a monumentally harder task than it would otherwise be.

I think it’s wise to schedule a full day off once a week. I also would like to aim to be done on the 30th so I can prepare for new years (shave my beard and get a haircut perhaps) and it allows me 24 emergency hours. I also want to take off Xmas, or at least do 1/2 days on Xmas Eve and Xmas. Volume might not be there those days anyway, although games should be good.

For that reason I’m going to plan as if there were only 28 days left in my challenge:
VPPs needed: 248,816
VPP/day: 8886.29
Rake/day: $1615.69

Looking at this I’m just gonna set my VPP counter for 10,000 a day. I’ll keep in mind that 8886 is a reasonable pace but I’ve been getting ~9500 on days I really push and I usually feel I can keep playing on those days if I needed to.

When I get in the zone and my unconscious brain sorta takes over and I’m just flowing and clicking, I feel like I can play seemingly forever. I usually stop playing because I feel that I’ve done enough for the day, I’m happy with my accomplishment, and perhaps I fear my play is starting to deteriorate. With this bet being a 47K swing for me, I think I can keep pushing a bit more in those situations.

It’s very hard for me to get over my in initial resistance and get into a session. I am working to accept that I’m going to be in my chair, in front of the computer, for hours and hours. I am embracing the grind, but it’s hard to do sometimes. Once I get past that and I’m just content to be there clicking, I need to keep clicking until my body says it’s time to stop, b/c that state is hard to get to and I can’t always count on when I’m going to get to have it. It’s much more enjoyable to put in massive volume in that content flow state than one of reactivity or resistance.